A Demon-Squirrel and some Gangsta Geese

So today I was talking to my friend before class. Since we were outside, I was not surprised to see a little squirrel hunting around in the leaves and grass. I thought "Aww look, a little squirrel" and went on with my conversation. The idea started growing in my head that it would be mildly entertaining to toss a stick near the squirrel and see what would happen. [I wasn't trying to hit the squirrel, I just wanted to see if it would jump or something.] I found a medium sized woodchip and tossed it close to the squirrel. Nothing happened. The squirrel went on with its business as if nothing had happened. I was disappointed but went on with the conversation.

After a few minutes, I had to leave for class, and I took one last look at the squirrel. It was staring right at me. I kept walking, thinking that if I just kept my head down and went on walking, it would leave me alone. I heard its claws clicking as it ran across the pavement, straight at me. I began to run. It began to run too. This particular squirrel was quite fast and overtook me quickly. It jumped on my head and dug its claws in. It was all “I’m going to make your head bleed for throwing that woodchip at me!”

Me: But I wasn’t trying to hit you!

Demon-Squirrel: But you threw it and now you must pay in blood!

Me: Help! Help!

So while I was running around like a crazy person, some geese saw what was going on and decided to join the fun. By fun I mean they started to chase me too, while hissing and flapping their wings. They were all “We’re going to freak you out even more because we’re geese and that’s what we do!”

Demon-Squirrel: And now I’m going to get inside your bag here and destroy everything inside for revenge!

Gansta-Geese: We be straight up Gs and that’s how we roll!”

Needless to say, it was quite traumatic. Lesson learned: don’t throw sticks near squirrels to see what will happen. They will attack.